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  • #16
    Originally posted by AgainstAllOdds View Post
    i separated two to three years ago. divorced now from an un-diagnosed BPD waif.

    but my daughter has been subjected to parental alienation and hostile to me all this time.

    i have tried for two years to get through to her and stayed calm through the attack and betrayals and the duplicity.

    so i have now cut all contact with her.

    i no longer have a daughter i am done!

    she is a 20 yo woman and she can go her own way without me.

    i am done and moving on.
    My daughter is 31. We went nearly 4 years without speaking at around the same age, in major part due to her mother deciding she knew what was best for her and the hurt divorce brings. My daughter came around eventually and we are much closer now. Keep the long game in mind, understand the ball is in her court and that the choices you have control over are whether to love her. It's OK to move on with your life and choose not to ride the emotional rollercoaster with a child who is not ready. Best wishes.
    ethikē aretē--phronesis--eudaimonia
    virtue of character--practical/ethical wisdom--human flourishing

    It is not a battle to win but an attitude to share.
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    • #17
      Perfect, GOM. You were not torn every day, distraught about the failure to have a relationship with her. Which is what some of these men do, and that is what this man seemed to indicate. And, in the end, it was up to her. Good job!!!

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      • #18
        thx PD and GOM. the pain and suffering i was going through had top stop.

        i was being abused by proxy as my uBPDexw was using her to get to me.

        I placed a line in the sand the abuse had to stop.

        it didnt it intensified and i have withdrawn from the relationship.

        it took me 30 years nearly to come out of denial about my mother, it may take my daughter a similar time
        train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose Yoda

        to thine own self be true!

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        • #19
          still no contact.

          it is getting easier day at a time.

          coming to terms with the sacrifice for my family all these years meant nothing to them has been the hardest.

          pair of selfish entitled bitches!

          i am done.
          train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose Yoda

          to thine own self be true!

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          • #20
            Originally posted by AgainstAllOdds View Post
            still no contact.

            it is getting easier day at a time.

            coming to terms with the sacrifice for my family all these years meant nothing to them has been the hardest.

            pair of selfish entitled bitches!

            i am done.
            The other day I got call from my twenty-something daughter with some very unexpected news:
            She's changed her family name to mine instead of her mothers'. Says she wants to express which family she thinks is the cool one.
            Things will still be going in the those li'l heads ... give it time ... I wish you all the best, in the mean time, and in the end.

            M

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            • #21
              Originally posted by Manalysis View Post
              The other day I got call from my twenty-something daughter with some very unexpected news:
              She's changed her family name to mine instead of her mothers'. Says she wants to express which family she thinks is the cool one.
              Things will still be going in the those li'l heads ... give it time ... I wish you all the best, in the mean time, and in the end.

              M

              That's good news.
              FEMINISM is a HATE GROUP - Feminists are HATEFUL PEOPLE
              It's time to call it out for what it is.



              The World of Men - Men's Rights / MGTOW / Sites of Interest to Men

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              • #22
                update guys, in February, i went to Canada to spend a week with my daughter she has seen the light and through the lies of her mother. she has switched 180 degrees. she is so hurt and pissed at all the lies. i was able to show evidence. she is coming to spend the summer in Europe with me.

                i have my old job back in Sweden as a system architect.

                i am at last winning, the house i gave her in the divorced was repossessed by the bank.

                i have managed to buy it from the bank, so i have managed to get through the divorce with most of my assets and now i have my daughter back.

                i didn't lay down i kept fighting and i won.

                its not easy but it is do-able.

                thx guys for the support.
                train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose Yoda

                to thine own self be true!

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                • #23
                  way to turn things around, man!
                  A man can gain no more respect than by, laying down his life for a woman. And a woman, no more than by, beating down a man. For a man to ask, what is fair and good and true and just, is to offend.

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                  • #24
                    I hope this all goes well for you, but I want to add a note of caution. I frequent many boards and I've seen dozens of guys taken in by their daughters manipulations. As I understand it, BPD is somewhat heritable. Also hypergamy applies to daughters as well as wives. She may just be monkey branching back to "daddy" because mom ran out of financial resources and she hasn't gotten her hooks into another dude yet. Fathers are often "red pilled" when it comes to their wives and women in general, but they often think the rules don't apply to their daughters.

                    I sincerely hope it is all working out for you, but you should keep an eye out for signs of manipulation anyway. Never give 100% to a woman ever again, and that sadly includes your daughter.

                    Best of luck to you.
                    I used to think collapse was inevitable. Now I realize it is necessary.

                    It was only a matter of time before the bicycles realized that they in fact did not need the fish.

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                    • #25
                      Originally posted by pbisque View Post
                      I hope this all goes well for you, but I want to add a note of caution. I frequent many boards and I've seen dozens of guys taken in by their daughters manipulations. As I understand it, BPD is somewhat heritable. Also hypergamy applies to daughters as well as wives. She may just be monkey branching back to "daddy" because mom ran out of financial resources and she hasn't gotten her hooks into another dude yet. Fathers are often "red pilled" when it comes to their wives and women in general, but they often think the rules don't apply to their daughters.

                      I sincerely hope it is all working out for you, but you should keep an eye out for signs of manipulation anyway. Never give 100% to a woman ever again, and that sadly includes your daughter.

                      Best of luck to you.
                      thanks for your concern, but she was genuinely taken in by her mothers lies, my daughter seems to be taking the path of the honey badger. she asked to see all the proof and is putting boundaries in place with her mother. she is taking control of her life putting herself through university whilst also supporting her partner emotionally. she may have been close to her mother but she is more like me than her. she has just passed her third year accountancy. she is so pissed she lost me for three years because of the lies.

                      she lands on the 22nd may and i will see more then. her eyes have been opened to her mothers issues and they cannot be closed again she want to understand more and recover from her mothers abuse.

                      these are all positives, she is very protective and loving and caring of her partner ands hates feminists. she is definitely my daughter
                      train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose Yoda

                      to thine own self be true!

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                      • #26
                        Good to hear. In spite of my pessimism, I am rooting for you. The rules still applies though. Never give 100% of your heart to anyone. To use a computer analogy, you should always keep one guardian process running that asks "Is this manipulation?". It doesn't have to take up a lot of resources or mental energy, but it should always be running.
                        I used to think collapse was inevitable. Now I realize it is necessary.

                        It was only a matter of time before the bicycles realized that they in fact did not need the fish.

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