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  • Feminism benefits men, too

    Emasculated man claims to be happy, and recommends it to others...

    http://www.cw.ua.edu/article/2017/04...nefits-men-too

    I am a proud feminist, as well as a man. Don’t worry. I don’t expect a parade to be thrown in my honor for that statement. But today, it seems like two distinct camps are forming among my fellow men: those who are proud feminists and those who are fiercely anti-feminist. This rift concerns me.
    OK... so right there... this is what I take:

    This guy is doing exactly what feminists told him to do... he is using his "male privilege" to speak out the feminist ideas, on the premises that men will not listen to women, so if they have a man so say it we will listen.. witch is absurd, but yet they keep trying... while at the same time this man have to humble himself to a point where he does not have any actual power or representation inside the feminism movement, because if that is the case then they will consider that he is talking for feminism... as instead of using his privilege to spread the feminist message... if there is any difference between those 2 concepts...

    Part of me feels like this rift has formed because there is confusion about the many facets of feminism. And maybe this confusion is understandable. The most visible branch of feminism deals with the empowerment and independence of women. This branch focuses on the idea that there are underlying social factors that cause women to be underrepresented in positions of power, the workforce, or in other areas usually dominated by men. It is the branch of feminism pushing forward the truth that women, like men, can be CEOs, construction workers, engineers or doctors.
    The thing is... you gotta earn that stuff... you can't whine your way to get a Doctor degree... or at least you should not be able to get a degree that way... a woman want to be a doctor? great, she need to earn it.

    There is too many male SEOs??? well, you have to overwork them, to get on top of them... that is how it is. Or you can have the government to force some quota, and then the quality of the company suffers because under qualified people is in charge...

    You want to be a construction worker? cool, get ready to lift heavy stuff and operate heavy equipment...

    If this were the only branch of feminism, then I could possibly understand how men would be less inclined to call themselves “feminists,” at least in any capacity outside a supporting role. I could even maybe understand the rationale behind the fears of some men that feminism is an attempt to strip away their power. If feminism’s overarching goal is to put more women in positions of power, or even on equal footing with men, then obviously man’s position will weaken. Right? That’s the conclusion reached by some men today.
    Yes, women have to perform at the same standard than men, the standard can't come down so women can get a degree... that defeats the purpose of the whole exercise.

    But this erases key components of feminism.

    Feminism is not “anti-male,” as much as anti-feminists attempt to paint it as such. At its root, feminism is a critique of traditional gender dynamics, but especially so a critique of misogyny. Despite the usual rhetoric on the topic, the definition of misogyny should not be confined to simply a hatred of women or an ingrained prejudice towards women. That definition might be clean and easier to comprehend for some, but it’s deeper than that. Misogyny aims to deride and demean “femininity” and “femaleness,” painting it as weak and less powerful in the face of masculinity.
    Yes.. why use a clear and simple definition of a word when it can be bend and twist this why???

    Misogyny is not longer the hate of women... but the prize of masculinity... so with this new definition you don't need to hate women to be a misogynist... all you need to do is to think that there is any positive aspect to masculinity...

    Women are undeniably the main victims of misogyny; it is designed to make life harder for them. But men, the very group that misogyny seems to benefit, are inevitably ensnared in the teeth of misogyny along with everyone else. It impacts the social forces that shape the type of men we become.
    How?

    We have been conditioned to view the expression of emotions as a feminine expression. We can rarely show emotion or cry or feel despondent without being mocked or scolded. When a man shows weakness, he is told to “grow a pair” or “man up,” as if these are cures to depression or unemployment or heartbreak. Men who play traditional sports like football or baseball fulfill the manly ideal: strength, aggressiveness, competitiveness. Sex and dating are viewed as competitions. Every sexual encounter is a “conquest.” No need to explore the deeper emotional connection. It only matters that you got laid. Men who openly express acts of love or romance often see their manhood attacked. “Pansy” was a common refrain when I was younger. At times, it was another p-word.
    When a man show weakness???

    There is a big difference between emotions and weakness...

    Why emotions can't be express in a masculine way? What is wrong with that?

    And don't take me wrong, this feminist is saying that a man should be able to express emotions in a feminine way... while I am making the point that a man should be able to show emotions in a masculine way...

    Misogyny affects our behavior just as much as it affects our thought processes. Society has conditioned us to believe that men will never truly understand women. Why bother having a meaningful conversation with your girlfriend when you can just as easily write her off as “crazy” to your guy friends? Even our conversations with our guy friends are restrained. Why talk about our mental health or insecurities or our fears when we can just talk about football or some other “manly” sport? We can’t be sympathetic. We can’t ask for help. Hell, we can’t order a fruity cocktail without it immediately being labeled as “girly.”
    Why bother having a girlfriend at all?

    We do talk about insecurities, fears and all that stuff all the time, example in place this week we have to work hanging up in a fork lift, my coworker talked to me about his fears of heights, so considering that he was not going to be able to perform the job in a proper way and probably end up in an accident, because his fear, then I decided to open myself up to him and I talk to him about my mental health, I told him I'd go up there, because I am crazy and I don't have fear of heights, so when I was walking on the fork part of the forklift, 5 floors up the ground, my co worker talked to me about his feelings about how unsafe it looks what I was doing... see? lots of communication right there... And just so you know, there was a woman there, I give her the opportunity to do it, first, because I thought that was the empowering thing to do... but I guess at that moment she was not feeling much of a feminist, can't complain tomorrow that we don't give her opportunities...

    I order fruity cocktails when I want to, nobody makes fun of me... maybe you need to find better friends...

    You see? here you are making a silly caricature of what it is to be a man, probably because you don't even know what it is to be a man in the first place...

    Because of misogyny, we are forced to constantly guard our “manliness.” Any encroachment of femininity is ridiculed by both men and women alike. It is like we are living with only half of our personality. No man is perfectly masculine. Some part of us, no matter how small or large, is feminine. As such, misogyny confines us to a cage, alongside women. Maybe a different cage, but a cage nonetheless.
    NO.

    It is because of feminism that we need to constantly guard our manliness. And your "manliness" is in quotation marks, my manliness have not quotation marks around it... as you see.

    I can be a very delicate man, for instance when I play the guitar, some songs require that level of detail and hand motion, but being delicate, or kind, or gentle doesn't mean being feminine... don't get your stuff confused...

    My intention is not to lessen the impact that misogyny has on women or make feminism solely about men. That would be unfair and misguided. Rather, I want to present a case to my fellow men that feminism is vital for us as well. Misogyny is a way to manipulate, marginalize and control men and women alike. By not taking up the banner of feminism, we are not only failing women, but failing ourselves as well. We are ensuring that we must live in constant fear of any expression of femininity. Men need feminism because we need to recognize this dynamic and fight to break misogyny’s hold on all of us. As long as women are not free from misogyny, men will never be either.
    Lest not forget that here "misogyny" does not mean the hate of women...

    All his argument can be sum up as:

    The only 2 options are to be a man or to be a feminist. Being a man requires you to actually be a man, and that is not good, so you better be a feminist... And as he say in the intro, he decided to be a feminist... and proud of it.

    Now this guy can go back to his feminist owners and report that his male privilege is crap, because he uses his male voice and it did not do the trick at all...
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